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This is a personal blog and any statements found here; whether educational, political, controversial, or otherwise stated, should not be taken as officially representing my employer, members of my family, or my friends. These are only the thoughts and opinions of Patrick Johner.



Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Top Five List of things any Dad can do to engage in their child’s school

"Because, ever since my children were born, the moment I looked at them, I was crazy about them. Once I held them, I was hooked. I'm addicted to my children." Daniel, Mrs. Doubtfire

I think this quote typifies my feelings as a father, and I can say during parent-teacher interviews last week, it typifies my dads too.

Last week during Parent-Teacher Interviews, I was asked by one of the dads of a student I teach, what are some kinds of activities he could do to help his child in school. After we discussed my “off the top of my head list” of possible activities, he was genuinely pleased with my information. His positive and honest reaction to me, made me think about finding the time to write in my blog.

Now I should point out that these suggestions are not rocket science material; but, I hope there are some suggestions below you might find useful. Further, I am a teacher…not a researcher. So these are ideas that I have gathered over the years as a teacher, and recently as a dad myself.
So here goes….

My Top Five List of things any Dad can do to engage in their child’s schooling.

1. Walk or take your child to school
This is a great time for dad to LISTEN to what your son/daughter is thinking about on the way to school. For men, the big danger is the desire to want to fix things, or give advice. You want to be careful about doing this. Remember the goal here is to listen, and get your son or daughter to trust you over time to share and open up his/her feelings about school.

2. Attend class events
Children love to have their dad attend class events. Talk your son’s/daughter for a list of future events. If you really want to help out in school, consider talking the principal. Many schools offer hands-on projects; such as, "dads only" events, school carnivals, sports activities, father-daughter and father-son activities, and back-to-school activities are great for dads to get involved with.

3. Attend your child's school conferences
A fathers' participation at meetings can change the dynamics of the discussion significantly and influence the outcome for the positive. Remember to be positive and supportive when solving problems. In fact, listen, and then listen some more. Wait for the teacher to ask for suggestions. We dads tend to jump in too soon. Acknowledge your child's difficulty, but model resilient behavior. It's possible to learn to manage issues as difficult as reading, writing, or math. Emphasize the things your son/daughter can do, rather than what he/she can't do. Every child needs to feel like an expert in something. Help your child identify her talents and support her interests.

4. Time, Time, Time!
The three T’s of a successful dad. Spend TIME with your child. For instance, Read regularly with your child. With young children, read together four or five times a week. For older kids, buy your own copy of what they’re reading and discuss it at least weekly. You can even come to the school and read once a week for 30 minutes to your child, or other children in the school. You don’t need to be an expert. Just be willing to read! Why not commit yourself to have lunch with your child once a month. I see the joy in a child’s face when dad shows up to take out his son/daughter!

5. Connect with your son or daughter
Use open ended questions to get your children talking about school. These types of questions will get them to interact with you, help you to understand the way your child thinks, and help you get to know your child better. Open-ended questions allow your child to imagine, elaborate, tell stories, and solve problems creatively.

Well there you have it dads! I hope you enjoy the list, and if you have any ideas to add, or wish to share your experiences; please leave a message or email me.

I leave you with this quote from William Shakespeare – “It is a wise father that knows his own child.” Trust me, he is right, and it is so rewarding this journey of knowing...!